Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Freaky Leaks

Happy New Year To Everyone. Here are few wiki leaks, not yet released, may never be released:

- A new iPhone app is banned in many parts of the world since it can picture a politician and tell if he is corrupted or not.

- A secret cable says that India will be corruption free in the year 2100, when most of the politicians existing now, will become too old and probably....

- China will put more pressure on US to open export for more products including tea bags, bagels, muffins, train tickets, bus passes, etc.

- Iran leader offered to play Wii game with President Obama, but white house rejected citing reason that he has already lost enough in mid term elections.

- Pakistan Premier is expected to get his performance review from US for the year 2010. As usual he got a review of "always exceeds expectation"

- AlQueda has opened more branches, and it might excel Citibank or HSBC, in no of branches across the world

- China has revealed that every product in the earth will be made in china. Soon you'll see a cloud flying over your house, saying "Made in China"

- Facebook will soon setup its shop in North Korea. It is expected to have 50 user accounts in 10 years from now, all of them are its own employees

- Citing pressure from Google and Facebook, Yahoo might soon sell itself in Ebay via auction, since there is no seller available in the open market

- Is Facebook worth $50 billion? Analysts revealed that they mis-typed b instead of m that caused social media bubble which'll burst one day

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Around The World

Hello all, let's sip a cup of tea and check what's going on around the world.

World cup soccer on full swing. If you haven't caught the fever, just mingle with your friends, no doubt you'll be infected too. US clinched to the next round in last minute. A slicing kick to goal by Donovan, when there was just 3.5 minutes left to go, was a big moment for US soccer fans. But when I finished writing this blog, Ghana has already defeated US. I love the custom in US that you watch game with few beers. Not because Budweiser sponsor major sports events in Television, may be because you don't feel the pain of loosing. European soccer fans shall consider following this custom.

While BP is eagerly awaiting that something will happen to turn media focus off the rig at Gulf Coast, but unfortunately no luck. Even world cup soccer is not helping them. Look at the impact it has created. 9 lives of people, environmental, industrial, political, and all sorts of effects. The complexity of technology involved in off-shore drilling questions if they are equipped well with safety measures. May be every industry has this kind of risk which probably might have never happened before.

The entire world surprised at Bhopal verdict in India. The surprise is that it took 26 years to come up with a verdict. No doubt that any crime won't be remembered longer, and thus helps reducing capital punishment. Wowwwww, What a nice strategy!!!!!!

iPhone version 4 released. Every version of iPhone is getting popularity like Windows use to get for its every version. Hey, Guess what, the big byte of this version is that it is 25% percent thinner than its recent predecessor. Never thought obesity is a problem among smart phones!!

Porn sites are getting xxx domain!!! Hey, that is discrimination. I feel bad for this industry and site owners, who dedicated their life to provide an outstanding service to Internet, and now become victims of domainization!!!

A.R. Rahman, the Indian icon and world's renowned music composer, is currently touring US for concerts. Despite the recession in US, I heard the concert ticket prices are expensive. My first question to concert promotors is, "We are in recession. Do you accept grocery store coupons?". If they do or not, we still wish them JAI HO(May victory be yours)

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

New Year Resolution

Guess, what could be the 2010 resolution of celebrities around the world:

Tiger Woods - I would like to be the best husband in year 2010, not sure who is going to be the wife!!!

Citibank CEO - We'll continue to pull investors from Middle East as long as they read our share price value(as of today $3.67) from right to left

Goldman Sachs CEO - I did God's work in 2009. I wish to do the same in 2010, until Goldman enjoys Fed support.

Iran President - Human Rights is at top of my list. Uranium enrichment is at the bottom of my list. We'll hit our goals starting from the bottom of my list. Besides, I'll continue to capture headlines in US News media.

Pakistan PM - I'll work towards making Pakistan, a free terrorist country...Hh...ooops...sorry for the incorrect phrase, I meant 'terrorist free' country

iPhone - Never expected to be a celebrity of this stature. Unlike Woods, I'm very honest to disclose that I had affair with too many folks, last year. I'll continue to seduce more people this year as well.

President Obama - Move Wall Street from NY city to Washington,D.C, didn't happen in 2009

Sarah Palin - Be a media friendly person, not in cover page alone.

Hamid Karzai - Afghanistan will emerge as a new nation flushing all terrorists and corrupted leaders to neighbouring Pakistan

Bernard Madoff - I'm awarded 150 years in prison, so I don't have any resolution in specific!!!

Michael Jackson Ghost - I'll take revenge on Dr. Conrad Murray for putting me permanently in sleep, even after I told him that I need to wake up after an hour.

Sunday, August 9, 2009

Reform HealthCare!!!!

It's so shameful to learn that nation's most serious issue to be resolved, has become the stage set for several actors to play their roles. First, the representatives divided as democrats and republicans, prefer to treat this as a battlefield. Second, the insurance companies continue to put pressure through sponsoring organizations fuelling the animosity. Third, The American media is more focused on polls to measure the success of Obama's every consecutive 100 days of his term. Finally, the tax payers, who has seen no ending of this drama.

The health care system reform has always become the point of controversy. Of course who care about a citizen's health as long as it gives enough fuel to debate and talk about. The unemployment inching towards double digit. Those who lost job can't afford government subsidized health care program. Those who have jobs can't afford rise in health care premium cost, sky rocketing every year, besides cut in benefits. Always the insurance company has upper hand to decide what kind of treatment one is entitle to. People with prior medical condition, insurance company consider them as a fixed cost and try to avoid'em. Does this system make anyone happy? Of course, it feeds the balance sheets of insurance companies and comply with corporate America's policy of make PROFIT at any cost.

Isn't it the time to reform health care system, then it is not too late. Isn't it the government's primary responsibility to ensure every citizen can afford health care? Millions of Americans would like health care system to be reformed, but do their political representatives realize this? The system is in intensive care unit, that require some sensible bipartisan conversation rather than show-up their revenge against each other.

You might have heard this statements at political stages:

"A patient in UK walks in and out of the hospital at no cost"
"Drugs cost far less in neighbouring country of Canada than in US"
"Why does health care cost so much in US?"

This are arguments fired by politicians before they get elected. Remember, statements and promises cannot reform a system. People expect sensible action that may not solve the problem, but at least doesn't worsen the situation. If Auto and Financial sector were given life using tax payer's money, why not the representatives come together and reform health care system that can benefit tax payers, who has helped bring stability to economy.

Monday, May 25, 2009


Every person has an inner sense. English dictionary list the word 'conscience' , referring to this sense. In reality, your conscience would think alike or contradict with your thoughts. Let's take a guess on the conscience of this celebrities around the world.

Obama: Oh Boy!!! I'll would have had a better life in Hawaii, than being in midst of this mess. I've spent more time with Treasury Secretary Geithner than with Michelle

Saddam Hussein's Ghost: Woooo..Ghosts are suppose to take revenge. Now it's my turn to take revenge on Bush and Cheney!!!

First Lady Michelle Obama: Hmmmm...Given Obama's personality, I'm worried if there will be a second lady at White House. No replica of Bill Clinton's period!!

Bank Of America CEO: Please don't throw shoe at me for the Merry Lynch deal. I deserve sandals.

George W. Bush: Damn, I don't beleive this polls!!! How can I be referred as the most unpopular president ever, when I'm elected twice to whitehouse.

Ar Rehman: Jai Ho!!! All you need to win an oscar is work in a western movie.

Hillary Clinton: I aimed for a President post, but I'm offered the Secretary of State. My next run for President will not compromise for any other post!
AIG CEO: How come a CEO alone can be blamed for a company's failure? Where did this regulators go all this year? We've been dealing with credit default swap for long!!! How can you expect the CEO to know the risk of this products while the Phds, who invented this, themselves don't know.

Iran's President: Thanks to Pyongyang, now the americans focus will move away from Iran. I should make use of this opportuity and quickly move all nukes to basement.

Joe Biden: I think I exaggerated the impact of swine flu , making a statement such as 'avoid air and subway travel'. I've to change my primary physician who gave me the incorrect information. Next time, I better keep quiet, as Cheney used to.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Excerpts from chit-chats heard at office pantry

Person I: Did you hear about TARP?
Person II: I bet it's an upcoming bollywood movie, correct?
Person I: Hah????

Person I: I'm sick and tired of news channels broadcasting on layoffs, credit crisis, bailout, etc. Give me some really good news to start my day?
Person II: Recently haven't heard of any good news and may be not for another year......Hmmmm....How about this? A Panda in California zoo gave birth to a baby girl. Mom and Baby are doing fine .

Person I: Hey, what's going on, every company is laying off?
Person II: I share your frustration. Idiots, who gave them permission to create financial products on our loans. It's hard for me to imagine, that foreclosures have brought down several companies, and economies as well

Person I: Did you hear that automakers came in private jets to Washington? This is ridiculous?
Person II: CEOs are known to be tough, aaaannngggg...when it comes to give up luxury

Person I: I'm going back to China, I don't think I can survive this crisis, what do you say?
Person II: Dude, are you going back to real China or China Town in New York, I don't see any big difference

Person I: (Referring to Mumbai incident) After all evidence, how can Pakistan President say that the captured terrorist is not a Pakistani? Is he crazy?
Person II: He is correct. Once a Pakistani citizen takes training at terrorist camp, he is awarded a special citizenship status called 'stateless actor'. The stateless actor has exclusive privilege to cross borders and create havoc

Person I: What do you think about Mr. Madoff's hedge fund?
Person II: I thought the hedge fund business is very complicated. I never realized it's that easy.

Person I: Hey, do you know about 'systemic failure'?
Person II: Very simple, just reboot your PC, you'll be good enough.
Person I: Ahgggg...(blinks)...Forget about it, nothing

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Be Different And Make History

Recently several people made news headlines since they uniquely outstood their opponent and made history. For instance, Barack Obama, Abhinav Bindra, Michael Phelps, and many other.

This are people with extraordinary talents. Can an ordinary individual make history? Why not? Consider one of the following, depending on who you are, to make history:

* Be the first hollywood celebrity to divorce before marriage

* Be the first husband to treat your wife same, before and after sex

* Be the first person to say “I like George W Bush”

* Be the first person to challenge the fact that Bush cannot turn around the economy

* Be the first American fast food restaurant owner to spell and utter the meaning of word "OBESITY' correctly

* Be the first doctor to attend your patient at a given appointment time, instead one hour later

* Be the first kid to say that you don't like window seat

* Be the first person to challenge Barack Obama that he is not Black, but Brown

* Be the first daughter-in-law to proclaim that your mother-in-law is not pain in the Ass

* Be the first subordinate to consider year-end review from your manager, as a roadmap for upcoming year